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Riders Republic’s Xbox Achievements Will Keep Me Up at Night

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Riders Republic’s Xbox Achievements Will Keep Me Up at Night

Ubisoft Annecy’s Riders Republic is out, huzzah! Now you can throw yourself down a mountain with what is essentially a jet-pack tied to your back from the comfort of your own home. You can smarmily cruise down a snowy mountain backward on skis, or ‘shred the gnar‘ on your board as the cool kids would say. You can even shred multiple gnars with your friends… I don’t know what I’m saying at this point. All I do know is that alongside all of these wonderful things that Riders Republic lets you experience from the safety of your living room, it can also ruin your life… and by life, I mean your Xbox account’s Gamerscore.

Am I being melodramatic? Not really. Any other achievement hunters out there will feel my pain here… I hope. Let me get to the point. Riders Republic has a grand total of 34 achievements that add up to 1000 glorious Gamerscore. That’s actually a relatively low amount of achievements for a AAA title by today’s standards. “Winner winner,” I thought to myself rather smugly this morning. “Easy G’s.”

Well, those “easy G’s” (wow, I really do sound like an asshat most of the time) come in the most infuriating of forms. Let us explore this nightmare together:

‘…Vici – Finish First in the Invitational – 70G’ Standard par for the course in the world of achievements. A relatively high-level, late-game experience with a big old chunk of Gamerscore as your reward. 50G or even 100G would have been even sweeter, but we’re not going to complain too much here.

‘Snow Blind – Finish First in 8 Big Events in Snow careers – 32G’ I mean, the requirement for unlocking ‘Snow Blind’ is fair enough, but wherein the ‘holy shiz wizzle’ — that’s actually a line from the game, no joke — did they get as obscure a number as 32 from for the Gamerscore? Well… surely it’ll just be one of a pair of silly Gamerscore values.

‘So crazy… – Complete a Shackdaddy Weekly Challenge – 16G’ …okay, 32 + 16 = 48… oh… oh no.

Yes, yes you’ve just come to the same horrible conclusion as I. These cannot be the only two achievements on the list with such bizarre values of Gamerscore tied to them.

On the contrary, there are 15 achievements worth 32 Gamerscore each, and another 15(!) worth 16 Gamerscore each.

I mean, what fresh hell is this? Just look what they did to my boy:

riders republic achievements

I remember back in the Xbox 360 days, developers use to do this all the time. Then they stopped, for good reason. Nobody likes having anything but a 0 or 5 at the end of their Gamerscore. Sorry, it’s just a fact.

In all seriousness, this is most likely just my OCD side going into overdrive. I actually quite like the achievement list for the game, Gamerscore values aside. There’s a good amount of variety in there without forcing me to do too many obscene things that I’m simply never going to be able to do. Enough challenge, without being brutal.

From the few hours I’ve spent in the world of Rider’s Ridge so far, the game, on the whole, is pretty fun. There’s a ton of activities to take on, the various sports feel different enough to provide ample variation, and there’s a ton of fun to be had messing around with friends and creating your own challenges in its world with the built-in tools.

But exactly what the reasoning was for these values? Is it some cool and ‘down with the kids’ reference to extreme sports my inept self simply cannot comprehend? Or was it for nothing more than a few giggles?

You know those things that keep you up at night? Bills. Climate change. Being horribly alone for the rest of your years on this watery rock because you obsess over menial things you really shouldn’t. Well, add Riders Republic’s achievement values to that list… and then cry deeply.

I can only assume this will forever be one of life’s great mysteries. Definitely not a first-world problem. No siree.

P.S. someone sound off in the comments and let me know I’m not the only one that is profusely upset over Riders Republic’s achievements. Make me feel slightly normal?

Riders Republic is available on Xbox One, Xbox Series X|S, PC, PS4 and PS5, Google Stadia, and Amazon Luna.

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