Yrsegal’s Hoverboard
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
Where we’re going, we don’t need roads. Sometimes a mod is self-explanatory just by looking at the title, but that sucks all the fun out of this, so let’s extrapolate a little. This Minecraft mod from yrsegal (the lesser known relative of Yggdrasil) gifts us with the coveted item we’ve been anticipating for decades, but are no closer to now than we were when Marty first whizzed down the streets of 2015Â Hill Valley. Seriously, the Cubs World Series win was more accurate than this, and that is wrong on so many levels.
The hoverboard runs on forge energy, and allows characters to drift about the map with their trademark soulless stare on their face, mulling over the complexities of life. Seeing one coming at you would probably be a fairly eerie experience, but your terror will soon give way to jealousy over their sweet ride.
The Eight Fabled Blades
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
Eight fabled Blades? Eight?? Who knew there could be so many? The only ones we could think of offhand were the vampire killer of Marvel fame, and that creepy little dude from Puppet Master. Neither of them are particularly fabled, though.
Fortunately, this mod is much more ambitious than that, containing eight swords of legend – each with their own powers and abilities. You’ll have to locate them first, tucked away in suitably remote corners of the world, but the real fun begins once you have them in your grasp (lifting them above your head while declaring that you ‘have the power’ a la He-Man is strongly encouraged).
The Arrow Slasher will slice oncoming arrows in half, nullifying the threat of archers. The Haymaker knocks foes backwards. The Lunar Edge can turn you invisible when under the cover of darkness. Each of them has their own incredible use, but are exceedingly rare. So don’t use them to take your anger out on a random flock of sheep. This is experience talking here.
Equipment Tooltips
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
Sometimes Minecraft mods are fun, allowing you to use hoverboards or wield mythical weapons. Other times, they’re incredibly useful, but not very fun. But that doesn’t make them any less worthy of a mention, so here we shift focus to a utility mod with the sole intention of making your life better. Maybe you’ll find that fun, if you get a kick out of, you know, knowledge and stuff.
It will add a row of icons to a number of equippable items, informing you of its stat breakdown, and how that compares to the one you are currently wielding. Just at a glance, you’ll know whether the Cookie Minigun is worth abandoning your Rainbow Shotgun for. Yes, these are both existing weapons that people have come up with, but are not necessarily the strangest. You’d have to look more on the phallic side of mods for that.
Old Java Warning
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
What’s worse than jumping in for a session of Minecraft, ready to take advantage of your favorite mods, and having the whole thing crash because your version of Java isn’t up to date? We’d wager having scorpions poured into your pants would be worse, but that’s fairly subjective.
With this mod, you’ll get a pre-game warning if your Java needs an update. Again, it’s not really that much fun, but neither is the experience of all of your Minecraft mods cracking up because you weren’t diligent enough on your Java updating. Also, it kindly gives you the option of ignoring the notification, or straight up demanding that it never bother you again.
Simply Coffee!
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
All of this talk of java has made us crave a tall cup of joe, so there’s no better time than the present to unveil the next mod, the delightfully perky Simply Coffee!
If you’re expecting to just be handed a cup as soon as you download this mod, you’re sorely mistaken (get a P.A. for that, pal), because you’ll have to work hard to secure that sweet sip of the good stuff. You’ll be doing the sourcing, the roasting, and the grinding all by yourself, even to the point where you’ll have to craft the container you’ll be drinking it from. Ceramic or paper? It’s up to you, so make it happen.
It may be a lot of effort, but your rewards will be plentiful – each of the coffees give you a temporary stat boost, and they just taste damned good, to boot. Coffee Dad would be proud.
Multiple Lights
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
Embrace your inner yuppie and adorn your blocks with shiny lights to really make them pop. Do it enough, and you’ll probably gentrify the whole neighborhood and increase property value by at least 30%!
The illumination from this mod varies from standard ceiling and floor lamps to lit fences. The latter is probably handy if you don’t want your livestock to be bumping into the barriers at night. Or if you just want things to look pretty. You do you, man.
Historicized Medicine
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
We shift our attention now to a very clever mod that, try as we might, we cannot stop erroneously referring to as Historical Medicine. Yes, historicized is a word. But it just doesn’t flow somehow, doesn’t quite pop. It needs some more razzle-dazzle. Marketing 101: always bring the sparkle.
But that’s another matter for another day. For now, you’ll get a chance to delve into the darker side of medicine’s past; a time when gangrenous toes were dealt with by applying a chisel and a hammer. Not only does this mod give you all of the tools of the ancient trade (including leeches! Oh so many leeches), but also everything that comes with them, like plague doctors, apothecaries, and cute little rats.
If nothing else works, take a cue from Pudding Lane and just light everything on fire.
Restriction
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
Ever wanted to play some Minecraft without all of that pesky crafting? Well, that sounds a bit sinister, to be quite honest – the word craft is even in the title, you madman! But should you want to give into your latent yearnings to deprive the world of fun, you will be most pleased to know that there is a mod that will accommodate. It is distinguished and yet bland, much like yourself.
The restriction mod puts limitations on whether certain blocks and machines can be placed or interacted with. It offers various criteria for these rules, including whether there is a special block nearby, or if you can see the sky at that time. You have your reasons for punishing people for gazing at the sky, we won’t even begin to pry. We may just cry.
Shield Parry
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
Ho! Ha ha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin! Ha! Thrust!
The world of Minecraft is most certainly a deadly one, sending droves of hideous ghouls your way, looking to do you harm. And though having a shield in hand goes a long way to fend yourself from the majority of blows, this mod allows you to turn an impenetrable defense into a fearsome offense.
Equipped with anything that is classified as a shield, you will be able to send projectiles careening back at your attackers, leaving them with a mouthful of flame and/or arrow and/or toxin and/or sharp-tongued insult. See how they like it! How does that taste? Does it taste like defeat??
Loyalty Medals
Best Minecraft Mods of May 2018
It’s time you were rewarded for your efforts. To you, brave Minecraft veteran, we bestow this most prestigious honor. Though many have strived to achieve the levels of greatness you have attained on this day, only a very select few have managed to reach such a lofty goal. For you have fought. And you have struggled. And you have done the unimaginable: you have played for a period of time.
Oh come on – you know that vanity awards are fun. So a mod that gives you a medal for clocking a certain amount of in-game time is always going to be welcome. Now is your chance to show off your lack of interest in the outside world by brandishing an item that openly declares that you have sunk 300 hours into Minecraft. You’re sure to win people over with that! They make be creepers or endermen, but they’ll definitely want to take a closer look.
Published: Jun 4, 2018 01:49 pm