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skate 4, tga 2019

4 Games That, If Announced at TGA 2019, Would Literally Save the World

This article is over 5 years old and may contain outdated information

Skate 4

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In the beginning, humans were hunters and gatherers. We didn’t have much ambition and all that was on our minds was survival and procreation.

No one in the Palaeolithic Era could have dreamed of even landing an ollie, much less ripping off a Fakie 720 Quadruple Kickflip Sexchange. The story of humankind then, was that of a humble species slowly advancing themselves to the point where all of this could become possible.

Eventually, skateboards were created and humans could finally begin to think beyond their meager existence to this point, but it wasn’t enough. Only a select few possessed the skills necessary to experience the thrill of sticking a sweet Fakie Nollie 360. We had to dream bigger.

The top minds in game development eventually invented the skateboarding video game, but it wasn’t enough; we had to go even further.

Then, one day in 2007, perfection was achieved and Skate was released to the masses by developers EA Blackbox. The journey was complete and our ancestors could rest easy knowing that anyone with access to a PlayStation 3 or Xbox 360 could “flick it” in an open-world environment.

EA Blackbox couldn’t have known at the time just how important and critical their magnum opus would be.

Skate 4

In 2009, the world was suffering through one of the worst economic periods in decades, known as the Great Recession. Politicians and economists tried their best to right the world economy, but nothing would take.

The recession hit EA Blackbox as hard as anyone else, but it hardly slowed them down. EA Blackbox might not have had any experience in how to stimulate a world economy; but as a team, they had one skill: making incredible skateboarding games that were both accessible and realistic.

Not content with letting the world burn, they did what they did best and released Skate 2 into the world.

Skate 2 was released in January 2009, and by June that same year, the Great Recession was finally over.

Coincidence? I think not.

Skate 4

via GIPHY

While they were well within their right to do so, EA Blackbox wouldn’t rest on their laurels. When the world needed more Skate, they heeded the call to action once more.

The Shrek movie released in 2001 and was a a huge hit, but it unknowingly released a curse onto the world: a Shrek movie must always be in development otherwise a calamity of biblical proportions would be unleashed onto the entire planet.

Shrek Forever After, released in April of 2010 marked the end of the long-running series. Dreamworks moved on from the beloved ogre and donkey combo, putting the entire world in danger.

Once again, EA Blackbox stepped up to the plate in the interest of humankind.

There were no plans for Skate 3 because Skate 2 had already achieved perfection, but EA Blackbox couldn’t stand idly by as the Shrek curse threatened to send humanity back into the dark ages; 2006 or 1 B.S. (Before Skate). So once again, the team leapt into action.

It’s a little known fact, but Skate 3 was developed in less than a month; it was the quickest they could react to the oncoming apocalypse.

Skate 3 was released on May 11, just a few short weeks after Shrek Forever After.

Skate 3 shattered all expectations and set a new bar for human achievement. The ancient evil deities that Dreamworks conspired with to create the smash-hit Shrek were so pleased with the effort that they considered their blood-pact satisfied and the curse was lifted.

Once again, EA Blackbox and Skate saved the world.

Skate 4

via GIPHY

Fast forward now to 2019. It’s been nine whole years since the last Skate game. The world has lost it way.

EA, believing that the world would never have need of another Skate game, broke up the talented EA Blackbox studio and spread them out among their various other studios.

But we need them now more than ever.

The threat of climate change and rising sea levels puts great cities such as Miami at risk. Nuclear proliferation and advancement in other deadly technology continues and the threat of world-ending war looms over us all.

Brexit continues to divide the United Kingdom at a time where we all need the people of the UK to be a unified force for good for the re-establishment of EA Blackbox. We need Skate 4 now more than ever.

I call on Geoff Keighley, the The Game Awards attendees tonight, and the entire world to send their energy to EA and the former members of EA Blackbox in an effort to will Skate 4 into existence and literally save the world.


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Ed McGlone
Ed McGlone was with Twinfinite from 2014 to 2022. Playing games since 1991, Ed loved writing about RPGs, MMOs, sports games and shooters.