The Witcher 3: Blood and Wine Romance Has One Seriously Weird Sex Scene

Blood and Wine Story and Love Spoilers Ahead

The Witcher series has never been averse to doing anything weird. Sidequests have brought players across the paths of questionable individuals, substances have been taken, Geralt has been possessed by a party animal, and he’s had sex atop of a unicorn.

We wish we could say that’s as weird as it gets, but then Blood and Wine came along to erase Geralt and Yennefer’s romance by taking the whole fairy tale thing a bit further. But before we get into the weird dance that is Blood and Wine’s romance scene, let’s just stop to look at how random it all was.

Here you are, stuck in a book of fairy tales and fables, escorting Syanna out so she can face the monster she’s created. The whole time she’s giving you attitude, and basically just pissed that you discovered her plans from before. After climbing a beanstalk, you and Syanna end up facing a huge giant who wants nothing more than to throw you back down to earth. Apparently, that gets Syanna thinking about her own mortality. That and the fact that she’s about to face a seriously powerful beast she betrayed. So, what does she do? She asks you to let her have her way with you, as a sort of last hurrah in life.

There is no argument, no Geralt trying to insert logic into the matter. Just the option of either letting her have her way or not. Unlike all of the other love scenes in The Witcher 3, there isn’t much of a lead up. She just grabs you, says she wants it, and that’s when things get weird.

What follows is Syanna pushing Geralt down through the clouds. I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t believe I had just agreed to be murdered. After all, I did get her imprisoned, and I was well aware that she was psychotic. Fortunately enough, the next scene showed her swimming through the clouds, playing hide and seek as she pranced through the cotton-like fluff that surrounded us from all sides.

The hide and seek didn’t help with the whole “Is she going to kill me?” sensation, but then she popped out of nowhere for a Spider-Man kiss (you know the one). I never expected to see Geralt dance while not possessed, but the Cirque du Soleil number that ensues as they figure out how to embrace without gravity is one of the oddest things seen in this game. You couldn’t be blamed for expecting the hand of god to reach down in a recreation of the Sistine Chapel.

The whole affair has this dream-like air around it, as if it may not really be happening. When it’s all done, Geralt and Sayanna lay there for a bit, cuddling in the mist before getting up and continuing on as if nothing ever really happened. It was a dance removed from reality, left to be experienced and forgotten as Sayanna approached her impending fate.

Blood and Wine’s romance is quite possibly the oddest thing you’ll encounter in Toussaint, and that’s really saying something. CD Projekt Red sure is one creative bunch.

For more features and information on The Witcher 3: Blood and Wine, be sure to check out our wiki.