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Starfield Vasco close up shot in lounge
image via Bethesda

The Funniest Names Vasco Can & Can’t Say in Starfield

What was Bethesda thinking?

Starfield boasts a charming feature: your trusty robotic companion, Vasco, can greet you by name. Fallout 4 players would remember Codsworth’s feature of remembering and pronouncing a player’s name. It’s a personal touch that adds immersion, especially after a long day of exploring the vast reaches of space.

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But here’s the catch: Vasco, bless his metallic heart, isn’t exactly Shakespeare when it comes to vocabulary. He can only utter a select few names, a little over 1,000 according to dedicated players like andy24olivera who data-mined the game’s files. This limitation has led to some truly hilarious situations, with players discovering the wonderful (and sometimes frustrating) world of Vasco-approved names.

The list itself is a sci-fi geek’s dream come true. You can name yourself after literary giants like Asimov, Clarke, and Herbert, or channel your inner starship captain with names like Kirk, Picard, or even Han Solo (though disappointingly, not Leia or Luke). Vasco himself is a Starfield reference to Portuguese explorer Vasco da Gama, who was the first to sail a route from Europe to Asia, around the Cape of Good Hope at the tip of South Africa.

Starfield VASCO saying player's name blurred
image via Bethesda

Video game and movie heroes are also well-represented, with McFly, Snake Plissken, and Ripley ready to roll off Vasco’s digital tongue. It even gets specific, recognising “Kal-El” (Superman’s birth name) but leaving poor “Clark” out in the cold.

However, where there’s a vast list, there are bound to be hilarious gaps. The internet is overflowing with tales of players whose seemingly common names leave Vasco speechless. Fans and players alike have shared some names they truly wished were part of the game. Here’s Reddit user NBThunderBolt complaining of not having common animal names. “No common animals. Bear? Wolf? No. But Ferret yes”. 

While others are seen lamenting not using all of the names that were part of Fallout 4. “It’s wild that my name (Cody) was in the list for FO4, and I heard it for hundreds of hours, but it’s not on the list for this game. Guess no one’s named Cody in the future,” remarked user mrsergraves.

Nicknames are a particular landmine. “Charles but no Chuck?” lamented one player, echoing the cries of countless others with names like “Liz” but not “Lizzy” or “Sam” but not “Samantha.” It seems Vasco operates on a strict first-name-only basis, leaving beloved nicknames firmly on the “do not pronounce” list.

This has led to some creative workarounds. Players have taken to online forums, sharing their struggles and offering humorous (and sometimes slightly desperate) solutions. One player, faced with Vasco’s silence, suggested simply changing their name to a more “Vasco-friendly” option every time they visit an “Enhance!” clinic (the in-game character customisation station). Talk about dedication! 

VASCO saying player's name funny
image via Bethesda

Here are some of our top picks for the funniest names Vasco can say in Starfield: 

  • Assface
  • Bastard
  • Boob
  • Boobie
  • Bulger
  • Death
  • Dong
  • Erectus
  • Ferret
  • Fragile
  • Fucker
  • Fuckface
  • Fury
  • Humongous
  • Humungus
  • Monster
  • Morgue
  • Muck
  • Mudguts
  • Nasty
  • Nipple
  • Orgasmo
  • Princess
  • Psycho
  • Puma
  • Python
  • Rockatansky
  • Sexy
  • Slaughter
  • Spider
  • Tittie

Just a little tip for players: To make sure Vasco says your name, turn on English subtitles and know that if both your name and surname are listed in Vasco’s spoken names list, the first name you input will take priority. For example, if you’re named Goro Takahashi, Vasco will call you out as “Captain Takahashi”.

Ultimately, Vasco’s limitations add a bit of whimsy to Starfield’s generally stale dialogue. It’s a reminder that even in the vast expanse of space, sometimes the smallest things, like a robot struggling with a nickname, can bring a smile to your face. So, the next time you boot up Starfield, take a moment to appreciate the delightful (and sometimes frustrating) world of Vasco-approved names. You never know, you might just get a nice few chuckles along the way.

While you’re here, do have a look at our other articles covering Starfield like why we think Starfield’s May update comes a little too late and how to fix the talk to Sergeant Yumi bug in Starfield.


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Author
Image of Syed Hamza Bakht
Syed Hamza Bakht
Freelance Writer
A freelance journalist passionate about games and technology. You'll find me working at publications such as Gfinity and Twinfinite, trying to gather as many game codes as possible! Otherwise, I can be found struggling against my giant backlog of games.