Slippy
Within the first few seconds of Star Fox 64, Peppy Hare notices something awry. “Slippy, get back here!” he warns, followed shortly after by, “Slippy, watch out! Bogey on your tail!!”
Such is the mediocrity that is Slippy Toad, a pilot so inept, he is in danger no more than two minutes after entering the cockpit. Your goal, theoretically, is to take down the enemies in pursuit, but true Star Fox savants instead focused their fire directly on Slippy’s Arwing. That’s the only way he’ll learn: through grim death.
In the original title on SNES, Slippy was a bit of an oddball, stuttering his words and occasionally getting himself in over his head, but his more pesky qualities were ramped up astronomically once he was given a voice. With his effeminate tone and absolute inability to competently navigate even the simplest battlefields, you will quickly grow familiar with this goofy toad’s face popping up on your intercom. His major contribution may be displaying the health gauge of bosses, but it’s not worth it. Blasting blindly away is a small price to pay for not having to save Slippy’s rear every 20 seconds.
…And that doesn’t even go to mention Chris Seavor’s wheezy rendition in Star Fox Adventures. That one hurts your very soul.
