Ahh, Animal Crossing. That sweet little simulator that mirrors the struggles of reality; namely getting into debt, fending off cockroach infestations, and being the only one who seems to do any work. Seriously, have you ever watched Limberg for a few hours? That dude hasn’t got much going on.
One of the Animal Crossing’s most indelible features is the slew of lovable creatures that make their way into town. Some are so charming, they will worm their way into your heart and become your best pal for life. Others you can’t get rid of soon enough, leading you to attack them with bug nets, and dig holes around their house so they can’t get back inside.
Any ranking of this colorful cast is sure to raise the ire of its fans, but we’ve carefully constructed this list based on their popularity, their design, and their intangibles (i.e., which one gave us the best bribe).
10. Ribbot
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
Already we mire ourselves in controversy – the first entry on this list isn’t even an animal! If Ribbot’s inclusion offends you somehow, simply substitute him for Cousteau, who is much the same, albeit a lot more French.
Ribbot is one of the jock villager archetypes in Animal Crossing, and as such, he loves all things sports. As an athlete, he’s a veritable machine, and will often express his excitement about the upcoming Sports Fair.
Oddly, he doesn’t seem to always participate in it despite his claims, choosing instead to lurk in the confines of his house.
He’s one of the only animals without a stereo, a sad reminder that the frivolity of music is lost on the poor automaton.
Or he can’t afford one, we’re not exactly sure.
9. Rosie
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
One of the most prominent figures in the franchise, Rosie has appeared in every game to date, and was even a major character in the Animal Crossing movie.
As such, she often pops up in popularity rankings; based equal parts on merit and moments of ‘oh yeah I remember the blue cat thing.’
Rosie possesses the peppy personality, resulting in a character who is full of vigor and excitement.
She boasts about her fan club, ignoring the fact that you appear to be the only member, and there’s no apparent record of you having ever actually joined.
At the end of her sentences, she declares that you are silly, an apparent term of endearment. Seems a bit rude, but okay, Rosie, we’ll be ‘silly’ if you so desire.
…Just not silly enough to wear that hideous pink shirt (cue burn reaction GIF).
8. Jay
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
Part musician, part art aficionado, all spectacular. That’s Jay, another sporty Animal Crossing villager who would love to arm-wrestle you, even though he technically lacks arms. That’s some gusto right there!
And to top it all off, he is prone to spouting ‘heeeeeyy’ like the damn Fonz. The more we think about it, the more we regret placing Jay all the way down at #8, and are considering completely shuffling these rankings to accommodate his ascension to the top.
Though he may seem fairly generic (Jayneric?) on the design front, Jay’s true value is only realized when you take a closer look and discover that he has got some seriously excellent eyebrows.
Not everyone has those in this game, you know, and as such, they are at a premium, allowing Jay to become the resident Dwayne Johnson.
7. Iggy
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
No, you like jocks too much! Don’t judge us, it just happened this way.
Iggy doesn’t get nearly as much recognition as he should, left behind for the more snuggly animals.
Indeed, poor old Iggy didn’t even appear in any of the sequels, and the developers even had the audacity to replace him with a jock penguin named Iggly.
It’s like they were trying to hold a good goat down, and we won’t tolerate it anymore.
Iggy’s most significant quality is the fact that he looks like he has at least three bodies in the basement. That dead-eyed stare. That suspicious white mustache.
The way he refers to you as ‘paaally,’ nudging you playfully in the ribs and making you feel severely uncomfortable. This guy knows something for sure, and we shudder to think what it might be.
Perhaps it adds to Iggy’s mystique that he has been conspicuously absent from subsequent Animal Crossing titles. Wherever he may be (we’ve checked the local police station, and can confirm he’s not there), we hope that he found the pally he so truly deserves.
6. Freckles
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
Another also-ran in the greater scheme of things, Freckles has absolutely no sense of style, and we love her for it.
She sports a garish bright tee, her hairdo is enough to make the fashionista Gracie keel over in disgust, and her eyes are spread so far apart there are some who believe she can see in two opposite directions at all times.
Don’t play hide-and-seek with her; she will find you.
Like Rosie, Freckles is a villager of the peppy variety, and due to this, she will often make sudden requests for rare fish, unobtainable fruit, or bugs that are out of season.
When you inevitably fail to succeed, she will express her disappointment in a way that is so passive aggressive, you will never quite get over it.
The only solution is to always carry everything on you at all times in the vague hope she may want one of them. Love us, Freckles… Love us!!
5. Erik
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
It’s the most wonderful time of the deer! If you’re in the mood to feel festive, just swing by lazy Erik’s pad in Animal Crossing, where his log cabin and comfy sweater will fill you with the holiday cheer of a snowy Christmas Eve.
If you live in the southern hemisphere however, and the opposite is true… well geez, you’re out of luck.
Though Erik only made his debut in New Leaf, he quickly worked his way up the rankings, and has become a staple of Animal Crossing fan art and fan fiction.
Most of that fan fiction centers around people trying to satiate Erik’s endless hunger, incidentally. Not nearly enough about his struggles with alopecia or trying to come to terms with his strained relationship with his father.
Just some ideas.
His laidback personality means that he will get along with most of the town’s residents, though his indifference may occasionally draw the ire of the jock villagers, who stand aghast at his immobility.
On that note, Jay is probably #3 by now, so you can look forward to reading his entry all over again.
4. Chief
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
His baritone voice and bedroom eyes notwithstanding, Chief is a cranky old coot who has a tendency to lose his handkerchief, and would prefer if you just stayed off of his lawn, thank you very much.
Though the villagers that share his grouchy personality tend to be men of fairly modest means, Chief is a veritable treasure trove of unique quirks.
He carries an elegant umbrella on rainy days, is an excellent speed reader, and aspires to be a poet someday. Yes, these are all canonical aspects of his personality.
Chief’s pretension is all-encapsulated in his motto; “Don’t wish it were easier; wish you were better” – words that are somehow both inspiring and discouraging. Also, he once wore a moldy shirt around town for an entire month.
That’s how avant-garde Chief is.
3. Kid Cat
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
A kitty superhero? It was fairly academic that Kid Cat would be included in this list. Plus, he’s one of the jock characters, and apparently that gives you guaranteed stardom.
One of five superhero characters in the series, Kid Cat wears a red jumpsuit and helmet prominently displaying that he is #1, suggesting that he is indeed the leader of this group of do-gooders.
Despite this, he’ll have to settle for being #3 on this list, because there’s more amazing animals yet to come. Suck it up, Kid Cat, there’s no shame in the bronze medal.
His trademark saying of ‘psst’ can lead to confusing interactions, as you’re unsure whether he’s trying to beckon you closer so he can tell you a saucy secret, or if he’s trying to display animosity by hissing at you.
It’s not dissimilar to living with an actual cat, what with their frequent mood swings and all.
2. Alfonso
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
For many people, Alfonso was one of the first Animal Crossing villagers they met as they moved into their new town (towns that were typically named Smallville, Isengard or Buttburgh).
He is a slovenly crocodile with droopy eyelids and a tic that compels him to state that ‘it’s a me.’ As such, he frequently becomes the scapegoat for troublemakers as he unwittingly accepts the blame for any wrongdoing that occurs in the village.
Alfonso’s house is one of the few that actually has a toilet, and as such, he’s a very popular character who frequently receives guests.
Alas, he doesn’t understand the concept of privacy or shame, as this toilet is proudly displayed right in the middle of his living room, leaving the horrified gyroids watching on whenever nature calls.
You’re a sick man, Alfonso, but we still wanna hang out with you. You and your loo.
1. Goldie
Best Animal Crossing Villagers Ranked
A Goldie but a goodie. This unlikely pup is the favorite of many an Animal Crossing fan, predominantly because she says ‘woof’ and it is just so incredibly adorable.
Possessing the ‘normal’ personality, also known as ‘sweet’ in some circles, Goldie is just a darling little neighbor who will fill your day with positivity. She’s plagued by nervousness and self-doubt, but hopefully, her place atop these rankings will give her a much-needed confidence boost.
Her dream is to someday become a dentist, an admirable goal, although a fairly unlikely one as we can’t imagine people being okay with constantly getting a mouthful of dog hair every time they attend a routine checkup.
What do you think? Did your most cherished Animal Crossing buddy make an appearance? Or were you left aghast at their omission? Sound off in the comments below on who you think the best Animal Crossing villagers are, and why they are most likely Stitches.
Published: Nov 29, 2017 10:00 am