Let’s talk about FMV for a minute. In case you weren’t aware (we know you are, but humor us in the interest of a robust intro), it’s short for full motion video, and once upon a time, it blew our freaking minds.
For you see, in the early days of polygons, we had to settle for whatever simplistic visuals we could get in-game, like suspicious chibi versions of RPG protagonists or a Stone Cold Steve Austin facsimile who looked as though he was made of Lego. But sometimes, FMV scenes would grace our screens, with their pre-recorded cinematics, and the graphical quality would skyrocket. It was epic, and really set the tone for the events that would follow.
Nowadays, technology has come so far that we’re literally commenting on the quality of a character’s eyebrows, rendering the magic of FMV fairly redundant. Let us take a moment to look back on the days when it made a difference in our lives, however major or minute that may have been, with a list of thrilling examples of FMV. For today, that will stand for Fun Musings, Visceral.
…Screw you, it’s hard to think of an appropriate V word.
Squall is a Beautiful Man
For two straight generations, Nintendo sat undaunted atop the throne of the gaming world, swilling goblets of the finest wine, until a failed business venture with Sony unwittingly created the greatest threat to their empire in the form of the PlayStation. With its bold transition into disc-based media, a whole new world of potential opened up, and one of the greatest weapons in their arsenal had been pilfered right from under Nintendo’s noses; Squaresoft.
Final Fantasy VII had already made its mark as perhaps the greatest RPG of all time, and the next entry in the series followed that example with guns blazing. Accompanied by a beautiful symphonic score, we see Rinoa chilling out in a flowery field, looking most exquisite. As things build to a crescendo, it shifts to an epic duel between Squall and Seifer, interspersed with foreshadowing of the wickedness on the horizon, and no shortage of feathers. Lots and lots of feathers.
If you weren’t hyped before, you most certainly were now. Make sure you name the protagonist something cool, like Talon or Edge or ASSBOY. ASSBOY sounds nice.
Welcome to Raccoon City!
There is a certain charm to the campy live action antics that set the scene for the original Resident Evil, but those with more conventional tastes would definitely opt for the FMV opener for Resident Evil 2. Hotshot rookie officer Leon Kennedy arrives in Raccoon City, reacting to a dead body with all of the passion of someone who has just found a dollar (seriously, Leon; “What have we got here?” It’s a corpse, bro, in the middle of the street – show some respect).
He soon finds himself surrounded by zombies, and after unloading a few rounds to no avail, takes to the side streets where he happens upon Claire Redfield. They climb into a police car, exchange pleasantries, and are accosted by an undead stowaway who is very dangerously not wearing a seatbelt. Leon carefully parks the car into a street sign, flinging the zombie through the window in the process, but before they have a moment to catch their breath, a truck plows right into the vehicle. The ensuing explosion separates the pair, and that’s where you take over.
The stakes were higher than ever, and you didn’t have any time to waste. Hopefully, you were as adept at survival as Leon was in the cinematic, because it would be awfully lame if you died immediately thereafter.
Frog Hates Mountains
This Chrono Trigger scene was epic enough in the original game, just using the 16-bit sprites, but once you see it fully animated in some of the finest work from Akira Toriyama, it really hits home that our boy Frog is a fierce badass. He makes being green look downright easy.
Taking the Masamune in-hand, he carves the mountain in twain, opening the path for the party to progress (or Frogress, if you will). The look of determination in his face, along with the muted tones of his iconic theme in the background, show you that this is not someone you want to mess with. He will avenge his master Cyrus and bring Magnus to justice. Or… he’ll just chill in the End of Time hub when Magnus joins the party, rendering him obsolete. Bad luck, Glenn.
Curiously, immediately after the FMV finishes, the game recreates the exact same scene as though it never happened, just in case you didn’t quite catch it the first time. Summary: Frog cuts mountain, it is cool, watch it twice.
Toot Toot, Sonic Warrior!
Though most would associate classic Sonic with the pudgy, cheesy design that graced North American game covers and informed us that inappropriate touching was no good, for some, the blue blur was never more perfectly encapsulated than he was in the opening cinematic to Sonic CD.
The anime intro saw the iconic hedgehog zipping through the forest, skipping over water like a basilisk, and carving through rocks with reckless abandon. Oh mercy, it validated all of our investment in the character, as if we could point frantically at the proceedings on-screen while shrieking at our parents “see? Sonic is cool! I don’t need an education, I have learnt everything I need to know right here. Sonic Boom, mom and dad, stop crying. Sonic Boom.”
This cocky, mute and stylish interpretation of the character was woefully underutilized during Sonic’s peak, but thankfully Tyson Hesse has brought it back to the limelight, and we are hopeful that he will someday soon have carte blanche over all future art, complete with Nipples the Enchilada. Our body is ready (as long as you don’t touch it inappropriately).
Cloud Doesn’t Wear a Helmet, and That’s Okay
After a successful visit to the Shinra Headquarters in Final Fantasy VII, Cloud and his cronies need to make a speedy getaway. They’ve just stolen themselves a neat puppy with a silly name and a perpetually burning tail, but they’re not done yet. They proceed to commit grand theft auto by jacking a truck on display in the foyer. Why does it have a full tank of gas? Why are the keys already in the ignition? Why does Barrett not shoot any of the assailants that attack in the subsequent mini-game?
No time for questions! Because they’ve got an escape to make, and Cloud chooses to ride out in style. His particular choice of transport is what makes this scene so iconic, barrelling down the stairway and crashing through the window on a motorbike. It cemented his status as the ultimate bad boy, and remains perhaps the most indelible scene in FFVII history.
The nearest contender would likely be the tragic moment when Aerith does her impression of a shashlik, but that’s obviously not as cool as a motorbike. Brum!
Jeff Goldblum is Lord of the Dance
The premise of any Goosebumps story is fairly straightforward: some kid happens upon a spooky item and/or location, messes with it against their better judgment, and is subsequently terrorized by the sinister presence they have invoked. Such was the nature of One Day at Horrorland, and it led to the events of the wonderfully bizarre PC point-and-click adventure, Escape From Horrorland.
This game has a wealth of FMV on offer, with characters routinely appearing on-screen to either guide the player, or terrorize them, as is appropriate with the subject matter. Their pixelated visages may seem dated by today’s standards, but back in the mid-90s, this was the stuff of the future. It even features the talents of Jeff Goldblum, who is in full creeper mode as Count Dracula.
As he engages in a troubling dance with the lead protagonist (who is a little girl, incidentally), you’ll have to use your disembodied hand to click on him at the right time, allowing her to escape his clutches. We’re unclear if this is also how you are supposed to fend off Jeff Goldblum in real life, but we’ll get back to you when we know more.
WWF SmackDown Lied to Us
This one still stings. Just Bring It marked the first entry for the WWF SmackDown series on the PlayStation 2, and expectations were high. We had entered a new era of power, and couldn’t wait to see all of our favorite wrestlers rendered with photorealistic detail, from Kurt Angle to the Undertaker, The Rock to Triple H, Kane to Perry Saturn (he was awesome, and you know it).
Once you fired it up, the intro accosted your eyeballs with so much magic and electricity, your head probably exploded like you were in a mid-90s Sega Genesis commercial. The models were absolutely gorgeous, so detailed and full of life, and unlike anything we had ever seen before. Taker plows Angle into the mat with a brutal Last Ride, and shortly after, Hunter nails the Dead Man with the Pedigree. Austin hits Rocky with a Stunner – the only thing is missing is Dwayne’s subsequent sell where he flops about like a fish out of water. Oh god, it was intoxicating, up until you proceeded into an actual match…
…Caution! …Attention!
The in-game models of JBI were hot garbage, and indeed, the game itself turned out to be hot garbage, where all of your problems were solved with the mighty square button. It didn’t come close to the kind of detail seen in other titles of the time, like Final Fantasy X or Dead or Alive 2. But for that brief, fleeting moment before we dared to hit that start button, we were entranced. Dammit, they looked fly today.
Published: Jun 5, 2018 03:17 pm