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If I had a Million Dollars: the Super Dangerous Wad Wad Edition of Saints Row IV


If I had a Million Dollars: the Super Dangerous Wad Wad Edition of Saints Row IV

As if the upcoming Saints Row IV wasn’t ridiculous enough, it was announced on Thursday that one lucky fan, for the cost of $1,000,000, can pre-order the ‘Super Dangerous Wad Wad’ Edition of the game. You read that right: one million dollars.

The so-called ‘Million Dollar Pack’ is now available for pre-order exclusively at UK’s GAME. Possibly the most absurd marketing stunt in the games industry to date, publisher Deep Silver has put together a pretty badass Presidential package.

So what exactly does $1,000,000 buy you?

  • the Commander-in-Chief edition of Saints Row IV, which includes an in-game Uncle Sam costume, the ‘Merica weapon, and the Screaming Eagle plane

  • a life-size replica of the now-legendary Dubstep Gun

  • first-class, round-trip flights to and from Washington, D.C. and Dubai

  • 7 nights for two at the Jefferson Hotel in Washington, D.C.

  • 7 nights stay in the luxurious Top Royal Suite at the Burj-al-arab in Dubai

  • a shopping spree with a personal shopper to create a timeless ‘capsule wardrobe’, fit for a President (don’t feel bad, I had to look up what a ‘capsule wardrobe’ was too)

  • plastic surgery of the purchaser’s choice

  • a brand new Toyota Prius, complete with 1 year’s worth of car insurance

  • a brand new Lamborghini Gallardo, with a 1 year membership in the E25 Super Car Club

  • a full day of ‘spy training’

  • a ‘hostage rescue experience’ (Who’s the hostage? Are you the one being rescued or doing the rescuing? Who knows…)

  • a Virgin Galactic Space Flight (you’ll be sub-orbital, but hey, man, it’s still space)

All of these things most likely total more than $1,000,000, so if you’re rich as heck, this is actually a bargain. That said, if I had a million dollars, I’d probably be more sensible: pay back my student loans, go to graduate school, or be like Barenaked Ladies and buy a house.

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