Because you have no other options and neither do we.
Look at yourself. It’s the eve of All Hallows Eve and you don’t have a cool gaming costume that’s a clever nod to 2015 gaming while still being cool enough to raise eyebrows. Well, this is a costume.
First off, you’re gonna go around your house and collect every red piece of cloth you’ve ever owned. I’m talking towels, socks, stray yarn left behind by someone’s wandering grandmother – anything arguably in the red hue family.
Now grab a buddy that isn’t afraid of being wrapped head to toe in red. The next step looks something like this:
Assuming your friend lacks a football shaped head and possesses human bones, this may not be a world-record Yarny cosplay. But it’ll do. As for you, toss on a pair of jeans, green shirt, and a black jacket. Your shrink-wrapped friend may be envious of your relative comfort. Ignore them.
Keep in mind, performance will be half the presentation. You enter all social scenarios first. Then make some small chat, eventually introducing your friend, Yarny. At this point you must start convulsing like a Mighty Bean in a blender. When your fellow party-goers ask why you’ve become a human demonstration of the San Andreas Fault, simply say, “Sorry, I’m nervous” and wobble your way over to your now-suffocating friend. Then you guys hug, and everyone is won over. Halloween complete.