Far Cry 3 & 4
Far Cry 3 and 4 have taught us many things in the little over a month since its release. It’s taught us that sometimes patience pays off. It taught us that elephants are awesome. And more importantly, it taught us that if you want to survive in these tropical islands you’re gonna have to shed your doughy privileged skin and become a total monster.
To that end, you should lift appropriate weights – sets of 10 curls – whenever you’re attacked by a wild animal, meaning your arms will be slightly bigger than your murder count by the story’s second act (no weights? PUSHUPS!). Do 15 crunches during the loading screens, 30, whenever you unsuccessfully try to stealth take an outpost, or 20 when you do stealth take an outpost. For Far Cry 4, do a solid 30 second plank whenever an eagle comes by to wreck your shit. Then, when it tries to come after your core, it’ll just fly away in shame at its failure.
