What a time to be alive. First, we’re able to make out with bears. Now, we get to be a goat and headbutt everything into oblivion. Recently, alpha footage of a game called Goat Simulator has gone viral. Since then, you may have felt universe around you boiling with excitement at the possibility of this game being a thing. Luckily, it is now a thing. From the aptly named Coffee Stain Studios comes Goat Simulator, a new game coming to Steam that is exactly what it sounds like.
The game is essentially a wild ragdoll simulator where you are a goat and you must wreak havoc on the human world in a plethora of ways, whether it’s breaking and entering some poor bastard’s home or just blatantly attacking innocent bystanders.
One of several new features revealed in the latest trailer includes an incredibly sticky tongue that can stretch and grab a variety of objects. Why? Who cares, shut up, you’re a goat. I can’t tell you how excited I am to grab a wood axe and give local BBQ attendees a rude awakening just like in the video.
You can pre-order your copy of Goat Simulator here and then pretend that every other game you play until its release date isn’t absolute trash in comparison.